Sometimes I wish I could turn back time...

**Turning Away**

Now it is time to discuss a very depressing time...a point in time in which I wish I could go back to and do completely over.  A time in which I am not proud to admit as such a huge Backstreet fan.

It starts on November 21, 2000.  If this date sounds familiar to you, it should.  It is the date that Black and Blue was released.  Millennium was an amazing album and I knew that it was going to be hard to beat it.  While Black and Blue sold 1.6 million copies in its first week and allowed the Backstreet Boys to be the first group to have million-plus first-weeks sales for back-to-back albums, it didn't quite match the hype in which Millennium got.  And to make matters worse, I flat out did not like the album.  There were a few songs which I liked but I LOVED EVERY song on Millennium.  Because I did not like the album much, I did not listen to the Backstreet Boys as much.

I was in my junior year of high school at this point and had just finished my first year on the varsity volleyball team.  When they started touring in 2001, I was preparing to try out for the varsity softball team.  It was also at this point that my family and other school friends told me that I should just grow up and stop being so obsessed with the Backstreet Boys.  My parents did not allow me to go to the Chicago show when they came on February 12 and 13.  I was not working at the time so I had no money of my own to pay for it.  And since I did not particularly care for the album, I was actually okay with it.  I was preparing for the next stage of my life.  I would be going into my senior year and knew that I had to start thinking about college.  Also, a new man came into my life that spring.

The Backstreet Boys were coming back into the area for their Black and Blue Tour on June 20, 2001.  But I did not care...I was madly in love with a man named Don Duncan.  While him and I did not technically start dating until July 25, 2001, I spent every moment I could with him.  That man is now my husband.

By this point, I decided to heed everyone's advice and "grow up."  I took all of my posters down and tossed them except for some of my very few favorites.  I got rid of a bunch of other merchandise.  I kept most of my books and videos.  And I kept the most important things...their CDs.  The thing that I regret doing the most is donating all 25+ of my BSB t-shirts to Goodwill.  I only kept 1 and that was my Millennium long sleeve shirt.  I still start to tear up every time that I think about that stupid decision.  I loved every single one of the shirts but thought that there was no way I was going to wear them when I went away to school.  That was really before the time of making quilts out of t-shirts.  Every now and then I will look on eBay to see if I can find some of the old shirts that I used to have.  I have found one or two but cannot justify buying them at this point when there are so many other things that are on my wish list.  However, this is also a reason why I want to buy every single shirt I see of theirs on tour.  While I usually don't due to money, I am slowly building back up my BSB t-shirt arsenal.

The one poster that made it through and stayed proudly hung on every single wall of every single residence I have ever lived in since getting it.  Well, right now it is not hung up but that is because we are in the middle of renovations.  As you can see it has been everywhere with me due to the not so mint condition of it and was a topic of conversation when my husband and I moved in together. He gave me two options....get a new one that was not so torn up or frame the one I had.  You can see what I chose.

Now, I did not stray completely.  I still listened to their music and tried to keep up with news...although not as well as I always had.  It took their hiatus, return with Never Gone, and a new BSB friend to get me to realize the error of my ways.  I am proud to say that I am back and in full swing, obviously.  Never again will I turn my back on these very amazing men.  And now, when I say Keep The Backstreet Pride Alive....I truly mean it.